Friday, July 16, 2021

Rest In Peace Gator


REPOST: This is a repost from June 2011.

July 16, 2021: A friend is attending a funeral today for her friend who "got a gun and took his life." I learned of this news while listening to an NPR interview from 2016 with Anthony Bourdain. Seems like a good time to repost this piece about our dear friend Randy.

                                                                   ~

2011: A good friend died this week. He took his own life. We are all shocked and saddened by his passing and we are all asking ourselves - why? Which is to say, we are having the normal human reaction to such an unnecessary loss.

I am not going to praise him here, most of you did not know him. For those who did, we will find the time and place to share our memories. Today I am going to do something in his honor.

This is for our lost friend.

If you read this blog and you have my phone number then I ask should you ever feel so lost, so alone that you consider leaving us, I beg you to use that number and call me. If you read this blog and you don't have my phone number then I ask that you call that person today, the one who you talk to when times are darkest. Call them today and agree that should you ever walk too close to the edge, you will reach out to them. You make that promise in the light of day; promise you will cry out past the darkness. Make the promise, make it today.

My friend called me at times when he brushed against his demons and we would look at the world in ways only two friends in conversation could, I believe it helped. This time he didn't call and all of us are left to ask - why.

Rest in Peace Randy, we will miss you for a long, long time.

5 comments:

mira amiras said...

A good admonition to reach out. I'm so sorry for your loss, and especially for his. Would you consider writing a guest-kaddish for our website? Your reminder would be helpful.

Erin Vang said...

I don't have your phone number (why is that, anyway?!) but I do promise to phone if I ever manage to forget any of the gazillion reasons I have to want to live at least ninety more years. And you please do the same.

And, you know, I think most of us would prefer to get a call at pretty much any time of the day or night than to find out that we had a friend who was having so much as a crappy, lonely day and didn't think we'd welcome a call.

Anonymous said...

Suicide is the permanent solution to a temporary problem. Suicides rarely can see past their pain to what might affect their children and other survivors.

To any who are into astrology, these few months have a powerful grand cross going on with outer planets. We should all take extra care to help any with inner turmoil at this time, and be kind to our friends, loved ones and everyone else.

Thanks for your offer of help Tim and sorry for your loss.

Anonymous said...

very sorry for that you lost a friend - thinking of you Tim - Lee

TrumpinJoe said...

I am saddened at this news. He wrote some of the funniest posts during his tenure at PSO. RIP rggator.